I started this blog as a possible creative outlet for me and more importantly (it seemed) I thought it might help others. But all the entries seem like burnt offerings.
Nothing but ashes.
Why would Christ choose me to be one of His children? I was a part of his plan before the foundation of the world.
Why did He choose me when all I do is ignore Him, demand selfish things of Him, turn my back on Him and .....even slap His face!
So many others could be or are or have already been so much better and more appreciative servants. Underachiever. Stiff-necked & hard-hearted. That's me. I am such a miserable wretched worm.....
Only the Son of GOD is capable of loving one such as me.
Am I any worse than anybody else? Probably not, but I'm no better than anyone else either. All I have is my own pathetic heart & soul. Like Rob Thomas; I'm here all the time & I can't get away from me.
Only He is worthy.
So why do I continue to kick against the goads?
It hurts so badly... so deeply.... I'm so tired. Physically, mentally.... & obviously spiritually. So tired....
But by only the Grace of GOD I will not give up, like Jacob I will continue to struggle until He heals my broken soul.
Psalm 51:1-17
1 Have mercy on me, O GOD, because of your unfailing love. Because of your great compassion, blot out the stain of my sins.
2 Wash me clean from my guilt. Purify me from my sin.
3 For I recognize my rebellion; it haunts me day and night.
4 Against you, and you alone, have I sinned; I have done what is evil in your sight. You will be proved right in what you say, and your judgment against me is just.
5 For I was born a sinner—yes, from the moment my mother conceived me.
6 But you desire honesty from the womb, teaching me wisdom even there.
7 Purify me from my sins, and I will be clean; wash me, and I will be whiter than snow.
8 Oh, give me back my joy again; you have broken me—now let me rejoice.
9 Don’t keep looking at my sins. Remove the stain of my guilt.
10 Create in me a clean heart, O GOD. Renew a loyal spirit within me.
11 Do not banish me from your presence, and don’t take your Holy Spirit from me.
12 Restore to me the joy of your salvation, and make me willing to obey you.
13 Then I will teach your ways to rebels, and they will return to you.
14 Forgive me for shedding blood, O GOD who saves; then I will joyfully sing of your forgiveness.
15 Unseal my lips, O Lord, that my mouth may praise you.
16 You do not desire a sacrifice, or I would offer one. You do not want a burnt offering.
17 The sacrifice you desire is a broken spirit. You will not reject a broken and repentant heart, O GOD.
Nothing but ashes.
Why would Christ choose me to be one of His children? I was a part of his plan before the foundation of the world.
Why did He choose me when all I do is ignore Him, demand selfish things of Him, turn my back on Him and .....even slap His face!
So many others could be or are or have already been so much better and more appreciative servants. Underachiever. Stiff-necked & hard-hearted. That's me. I am such a miserable wretched worm.....
Only the Son of GOD is capable of loving one such as me.
Am I any worse than anybody else? Probably not, but I'm no better than anyone else either. All I have is my own pathetic heart & soul. Like Rob Thomas; I'm here all the time & I can't get away from me.
Only He is worthy.
So why do I continue to kick against the goads?
It hurts so badly... so deeply.... I'm so tired. Physically, mentally.... & obviously spiritually. So tired....
But by only the Grace of GOD I will not give up, like Jacob I will continue to struggle until He heals my broken soul.
Psalm 51:1-17
1 Have mercy on me, O GOD, because of your unfailing love. Because of your great compassion, blot out the stain of my sins.
2 Wash me clean from my guilt. Purify me from my sin.
3 For I recognize my rebellion; it haunts me day and night.
4 Against you, and you alone, have I sinned; I have done what is evil in your sight. You will be proved right in what you say, and your judgment against me is just.
5 For I was born a sinner—yes, from the moment my mother conceived me.
6 But you desire honesty from the womb, teaching me wisdom even there.
7 Purify me from my sins, and I will be clean; wash me, and I will be whiter than snow.
8 Oh, give me back my joy again; you have broken me—now let me rejoice.
9 Don’t keep looking at my sins. Remove the stain of my guilt.
10 Create in me a clean heart, O GOD. Renew a loyal spirit within me.
11 Do not banish me from your presence, and don’t take your Holy Spirit from me.
12 Restore to me the joy of your salvation, and make me willing to obey you.
13 Then I will teach your ways to rebels, and they will return to you.
14 Forgive me for shedding blood, O GOD who saves; then I will joyfully sing of your forgiveness.
15 Unseal my lips, O Lord, that my mouth may praise you.
16 You do not desire a sacrifice, or I would offer one. You do not want a burnt offering.
17 The sacrifice you desire is a broken spirit. You will not reject a broken and repentant heart, O GOD.
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