'Never Married' Rant

I had dinner last night with a good friend that I haven't spent any time with in a long while. It was good to reconnect w/her after what seemed like such a long time. She is a single never married career woman, although not from her own choice. Like most little girls she grew up dreaming of marriage and a family, the typical things. But throughout her life those things continued to elude her. The thing about this woman I find so amazing is she has continued to adjust, making the best of her situation. She has been continually been bombarded with factors & events in her life that would make most people give up, turn back or hide. She hasn't. Time after time since she was a young girl, she has cast aside her fears and steered into the wind. Not to say she hasn't had moments, maybe even seasons of doubt; no, even in the short time I've known her I've seen or she's told me about a couple of those, but the fact is, she has carried on with a determination that we all could learn from.

But that perseverance does not take away any of the hurt...the loneliness.....

So, like previous times in her life she presses onward in her career, doing what she feels GOD wants her to do, leaning on His guidance because she feels that where He is leading her.

After processing our conversation, I wonder...."Is she running?" Maybe, as disciples of Christ, I find most of us do at one time or another. Either way, who am I to say? I do think she is following a path that GOD seems to be opening for her because her heart is being stirred on a deep level and other paths are closed. And that fact brings me to what is increasingly on my mind.

The problem she has & that I have & I guess most any single person has is we have no one to confirm us, to encourage us to do what we feel we should. Yes, we may have friends and family that 'are there for us', but it is not the same thing. Let me repeat that, "It is NOT the same thing!" You may say, "As a Christian, you do have GOD, what are you whining about?" Yes, we do have Christ, and He is a great comfort to us. I'm not saying that He can't supply our needs or that having a spouse would 'complete us'. The fact is we are relational beings and there is something to be said for the union of a man & a woman. The fact is we are human, most of us have a 'design need' that draws us to want an intimate relationship with a member of the opposite sex. And being a Christian does not mean that we are satisfied. As a married person, are you? We are NOT in heaven yet! Even with Christ, we are still 'wanting' on this side of eternity, that very fact drives us in our day-to-day need for Him. You may also think that I'm foolish & uninformed about my ideas due to the very fact I have never been married. The fact is 'never married people' & 'married people' stand on two different sides of a fence with a gate that opens only one way and one can never go back. This, in my mind includes divorced people as well, but they have other issues that separate them in our society too. I won't even attempt to address the particular struggles that they face in this cold world nor am I belittling their ordeals or the crap they have to put up with. All I do know is I am single, never married and I KNOW there is a difference.
When a person gets married (especially when they have children) their lives are so dramatically different, they cannot remember or even comprehend what it is like to be single. But the problem that irritates me the most is quite of a few think they can & they make assumptions about what we think, believe & hope for that are usually off base. And that is only if they are even aware of us! I guess I have to admit there is something that infuriates me more than that; and that is being ignored or dismissed as a virtual non-entity from institutions such as the church! Crap, this is pissing me off! I'll pick it up later...